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It’s a new year, and it’s time for a Self-Care check-up.

When was the last time that you…

  1. Did absolutely nothing? You brain, body, and soul needs rest from time to time. Between work, school, taking care of family, community contributions, and our social lives, we are all pretty busy.  Sometimes you just need to be.  How can you just be?  Well, you schedule nothing on your calendar, make sure that you are not in a hurried state of mind, and you are not thinking about or planning anything. Take a technology break by putting your phone away, and turning off your computer.  You might be in your pj’s and fluffy house shoes, and your hair might not be combed.  That’s okay.  Your body needs this type of rest every now and then.  Give yourself permission to do nothing.  Your body will thank you for it.
  2. Cried? I am all about girls and women being powerful, strong, and running the world…but guess what, we have emotions too, and it’s totally okay to express those.  Sometimes girls/women think that they have to have it all under control, manage everything, be perfect, and that they cannot appear to be having a moment of weakness.  This isn’t true at all!  We are all human, and guess what, humans have weaknesses, and humans make mistakes, get frustrated, and get sad sometimes.  Don’t bottle all of your emotions up, because that bottle will soon overflow and that overflow might not be pretty or nice.  That overflow could look like anger, bitterness, revenge, or resentment.  So, let it out.  Cry if you need to.  Vent about how you feel.  You are human, and this is what we do.  You’ll be an even stronger girl/woman if you let yourself be real and in touch with your feelings.  Try it out.
  3. Compared yourself to others? I always teach my clients that comparison kills confidence, because it’s so true.  When you compare your body, looks, belongings, etc. to friends or celebrities either in person or on social media it’s likely that you won’t feel too great afterwards.  Stop it!  If you want to compare yourself to someone, compare yourself, to yourself.  For example, one of my life-coaching clients recently compared like this “last year I ran one 5K, but this year, I hope to run two 5K’s”.  Compare like that, so that you can challenge yourself and grow!
  4. Did something fun? This is so important.  Laughter is nature’s medicine, so it’s important to make sure that you schedule something fun that will put a smile on your face.  This could be a 10-minute dance party in your living room, a quick trip to get a yummy smoothie, a dinner with a friend, a vacation to somewhere dreamy, getting a massage, or it could even be registering for a cool class where you learn something new like art, photography, cooking, or something like that.  Listen, your life cannot be all work and no play. Boooooo!  You HAVE to do something fun, okay?
  5. Gave yourself a compliment? Stop searching for likes and double taps from strangers you’ve never even met before on social media.  I mean, think about it, do they really matter?  They don’t even know you, right? But, who knows you best…YOU!  What matters most is that you are building yourself up on a daily basis instead of putting yourself down.  I suggest starting your day by telling yourself positive affirmations for the day.  These can start with “I can” or “I will”.  For example, on a day when you are required to give a presentation at work of school, you can look in the mirror that morning and say, “I CAN rock this presentation”.  “I WILL deliver my material like a #boss, and I’m going to leave the room with them wanting to hear more from me”.   Get it?  Start tomorrow.  Rise, shine, look in the mirror and build yourself up before you leave the house and face the haters (because you know they’re there).  But, no worries, you already built yourself up, so the haters can’t stop you! Go Girl!
  6. Worked out? I’ll admit, this is a tough one for me.  But, research shows that working out has so many benefits for your mental health.  It increases endorphins which are your happy chemicals in your brain, so working out can actually elevate your mood.  It also helps to reduce stress, can help you sleep better, and of course, can improve your physical health.  I know it’s tough, but try to at least fit in 30 minutes per day of some type of physical activity.
  7. Journaled? Journaling is a really good habit to develop.  I encourage all of my clients to journal because it can be a good stress reliever, it helps with setting goals, and it’s a great way to track your thought processes on life’s situations to see how much you’ve grown and accomplished.  I recently had an 18-year-old former client of mine send me a video clip as she flipped through a journal that I gifted her about a year ago. It was full or writings, poems, goals, etc. and she was so thankful that she was able to look back on her senior year of high school and visually see her growth as she is a freshman in college now.  As you can see, journaling is pretty cool.
  8. Felt hopeless, depressed, or lost? There are a lot of people who are waiting to help you get out of that funk.  If your employer has an EAP program, you should be able to receive at least 6 FREE Counseling sessions from a Licensed Professional Therapist.  Please take advantage of this! Therapy is sooo good, ya’ll!  You could also use your health benefits to obtain some counseling sessions too.  If confidence, self-esteem, goal-setting, smart decision making, self-worth, smart social media usage, bullying, or leadership is you or your daughter’s struggle, then I can coach you on those topics because those areas are my jam (I specialize in adolescent girls, but Life-Coach some women too ). However, if you’ve been having suicidal thoughts or thoughts of harming yourself or others, please call 911 or contact the National Suicide Prevention Line today at 1-800-273-8255.  The phone line is open 24 hours waiting to assist you.  Listen, your feelings are valid, and it’s okay to reach out to someone to seek help.

Take care of yourself, girl!

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